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Laugh: Mother's Day rough on Kardashians

POSTED: May 18, 2017 7:00 p.m.
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Argus Hamilton is the host comedian of the Comedy Store in Hollywood and can be reached at argusjoke@yahoo.com.

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HOLLYWOOD - God bless America, and how’s everybody?

"Keeping Up with the Kardashians" aired a new episode Sunday centered on Mother’s Day in an attempt to regain TV viewers who have left them this season. The family’s bizarre antics have caught up with them. Mother’s Day has to be the most embarrassing day of the year for Kylie Jenner.

President Trump ordered Homeland Security to block cyber-attacks that hit Europe Thursday, blacking out Britain’s health care system. An attack in the U.S. could imperil hospital patient care and halt Trump from tweeting. After lengthy deliberations, Democrats decided that if they die, they die.

FBI former director James Comey was profiled on CBS 60 Minutes Sunday in a two-year-old interview that CBS aired to enhance his current credibility. He plays the little angel to the hilt. Jim Comey’s opera solo won’t be over till he costs Hillary and Trump the presidency of the United States.

James Comey is reportedly furious over the lack of respect he received from his public firing after he cost Hillary the election then refused to probe Obama’s people for unmasking Trump people. He was clearly in over his head. A really good investigator would have seen the firing coming.

CNN ripped President Trump for having two scoops of ice cream for dessert at a White House dinner while everyone else has one. If Trump was just representing himself, he’d have just one scoop. However he represents the people of the United States and he feels we deserve that extra scoop.

President Trump last week alarmed Baby Boomer reporters by firing the FBI director, meeting with Henry Kissinger, and revealing he might have an Oval Office taping system. Talk about déjà vu. If this were Christmas, the carolers would be outside singing "It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like Nixon."

Defense Secretary Jim Mattis will go to South Korea to oversee installation of U.S. anti-missile systems to protect Seoul from a North Korean attack. It’s tricky. When a NORAD operator spots missiles heading for Seoul, he faces the difficult choice of shooting them down or selling Samsung short.

Fox News former star Bill O’Reilly gave an interview to Glenn Beck Friday after he was fired by Fox News due to the outrage over his sexual harassment accusation settlements. O’Reilly said he believes that he was destroyed by dark and mysterious forces. I believe doctors call them hormones.

New Orleans took down the statue of Confederate President Jefferson Davis. Not only was he a slave owner, he won a battle over the Mexican Army in 1848 that allowed the U.S. to seize California from Mexico. Real Democrats are only able to defend themselves today if you have got a Ouija Board.

The Los Angeles Times quoted travel agents who said that this summer could boast the most number of U.S. air travelers in history. One new airline just opened at L.A. Airport which offers a three-bedroom suite, a butler and a masseuse aboard the flight. The name of the airline is Not United.

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