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10 signs a man is leading you on
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Is he really interested in you, or is he just playing with you? These are the telltale signs that he's leading you on. - photo by Hannah Chudleigh
He's showed some interest. There's been some flirting. He makes you feel special, and you're feeling some chemistry. You might even have gone on a few dates already. But, in the back of your mind, you're wondering if he really means it.

As you get to know your potential beau more, don't be fooled by appearances. Keep in mind these 10 red flags to tell if he's just leading you on.

1. He's overly complimentary.

If it feels like he's schmoozing you, he probably is. He's trying too hard to keep you interested so that he can keep you as an open option. Beware of cheesy flirting, too many emoticons, and compliments that are generic or vague. If there is more complimenting than actual conversation, drop him!

2. You notice him doing similar things with other women.

Flirting with other people is a sure sign that he's just leading you on. You're nothing special to him, and he's just stringing you along, just like he's doing with several other women.

3. He doesn't like to do mundane things with you.

All your time together is centered on fun. Nice dates are great once in a while, but if he doesn't want to get more casual, then he's not interested in you as a person. He's probably more in love with the idea of being in love than he is in love with you. He wants to pretend like he's still interested, but he's just keeping up pretenses. A man who is truly interested in you won't mind just hanging out once in a while, doesn't mind helping you clean the kitchen, and it totally chill with making food at home rather than going out. True love lasts through ordinary days and is built up by everyday actions but if he's leading you on, he only wants you for the fun times.

4. He doesn't make long-term plans with you.

He's expecting someone better to come along eventually, so he doesn't plan ahead with you because he doesn't plan on keeping you in his future. He doesn't plan anything that's more than a few days in advance because he doesn't want to commit.

5. He's repetitive.

If he asks you the same questions several times, or if he tells you the same stories over and over, then he's probably just running through all the same flirting techniques that he uses with everyone else. He's had this conversation a hundred times before with a hundred different girls, and you are just the next one in line.

6. He's moody.

One day he's all over you; the next, he brushes you off. He will probably ignore you when he's more interested in someone else, and he comes back to you when it doesn't work out. You are his second choice, so his attention to you varies a lot.

7. He doesn't take you out in public or talk about you to his friends.

This is a huge red flag. He is just keeping you under the hood for later. If a man is really interested in you, he will be proud to introduce you to his friends and family. This doesn't mean that you have to meet all his family at once, and it doesn't mean that he has to put it all over social media. Some people are more private than others. But if he's hiding his relationship with you or denies being interested in you, then you're really not important to him.

8. He gets you confused with someone else.

He might think that you played piano when you really played violin. He says "remember when..." and you don't remember any of it. He forgets unique details about you because he's trying to keep track of too many women. If he ever calls you by the wrong name, look out.

9. He doesn't text you back consistently.

Sometimes he texts you for hours at a time. Then another time, he doesn't text you back until two days later. He'll apologize and say that he didn't see your missed call, or say that he meant to text you and it didn't send. He saw your Facebook message but never replied. Everybody messes up sometimes, but if your communication is unreliable for an extended amount of time, this is a red flag. Communicating with you obviously isn't a priority for him. He's too busy leading on other girls.

10. You think he is.

Trust your instincts. Your gut feelings have some merit. Don't be paranoid or clingy, but if you get the same impression multiple times, you might be on to something. If you feel like he's leading you on, be cautious. You can tell when someone is really sincere, and if you aren't getting that vibe from him, then you might want to reconsider your own interest.
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New Medicare cards are in the mail and scammers are on the prowl
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The Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services has begun mailing new Medicare Health Insurance ID cards. The program no longer uses Social Security numbers to identify people. - photo by Lois M Collins
The federal government is beginning to send out new ID cards to the 58 million Americans who benefit from Medicare. But since many of the people who will receive them don't know they're coming or why, scammers are already gearing up to take advantage.

An AARP survey shows as many as three-fourths of Americans 65 and older have no idea the cards are coming, so some individuals may be duped with claims that they're supposed to pay a fee or provide personal information that will be used, instead, to defraud them.

The new cards are the first reissue in years, and the most striking part of the redesign is that the cards no longer carry the beneficiary's Social Security number. Congress mandated the removal of that number as an identifier for Medicare beneficiaries by next April. Instead, the card has a Medicare Beneficiary Identifier number, an 11-digit combination of numbers and letters.

The new Medicare cards are now being mailed out in batches, starting with the Eastern seaboard and moving west. Most Medicare beneficiaries will receive their cards over the next six months, as long as the Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services (CMS) has their correct mailing address. Once the cards are in hand, people can share the new identification number with their health care providers. During a transition period, either card is valid.

The old cards, which used Social Security numbers as the personal identification number, should be destroyed.

AARP recently launched an education campaign to warn consumers about scams related to the new Medicare cards.

The membership organization's "Fraud Watch" consultant, Frank Abagnale reformed con man, scammer and the subject of the movie and book "Catch Me If You Can" tells senior citizens the only time they need to carry the actual Medicare card is to health care appointments. Otherwise, it should be left in a safe place. If they want to carry one in their wallet or purse, he says, make a copy and black out the first seven numbers.

Since the cards were announced, scammers have already:

  • Called seniors and asked for their bank account information so that money on their old card could be returned. There is no money on the old card and CMS never asks for personal information over the phone.
  • Offered to send the new card after Medicare beneficiaries pay a $25 fee to cover expenses related to the card. The card is free.
  • Said the card will be mailed out as soon as the older person verifies his or her Social Security number, mailing address and other personal information. CMS already knows the beneficiary's Social Security number and it's no longer being used in conjunction with health care.
AARP and the Federal Trade Commission will hold a free online seminar about the cards and the fraud attempts they have spawned on Thursday, April 19, at 7 p.m. EDT. Register at: www.aarp.org/FraudWebinar. CMS also offers a "frequently asked questions" guide to the new cards.

The AARP Fraud Watch Network says consumers can sign up for its Watchdog Alert emails that deliver breaking scam information, or call a free helpline at 877-908-3360 to speak with volunteers trained in fraud counseling. Abagnale also hosts a weekly podcast for AARP, called The Perfect Scam.
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