The good news is there is a world of free data available to us at the stroke of a computer key. It moves to us like lightening.
The bad news is there is a world of free data available to us at the stroke of a computer key. It moves to us like lightening.
Sounds like a book someone once wrote that begins, “It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.”
And then I think of a country song I once wrote, “It’s Hell To Face The Music, When They’re Playing Our Old Song.”
The bottom line is, cyberspace technology is comprised of the good, the bad and the ugly. Gotta be careful.
On average, I get 200 emails per day. Some of the information is absolutely junk, some is useful, some can siphon your bank account if you are gullible and some is just entertaining.
Lately I’ve been getting emails from a feature service titled “Living On A Dime.” Obviously that’s an exaggeration to get you to open the email, the contents of which are tips on living more efficiently. I seldom look at these because if I get any more efficient, I’ll be eating “Spam Helper.” Just kidding ... my wife’s a great cook.
Actually, “living on a dime” is a phrase that needs editing to factor the times. It would be more like “living on five bucks.” Let’s face it, between inflation and the economy, the wages of sin are no longer death. Now it’s just a really bad headache with muscle pains.
One segment of “Living On A Dime” was about “great ways to use leftover Halloween candy.” So what’s the big mystery there? Save it until next Halloween. Did you know that there is candy corn out there today that could actually be carbon dated?
Then for Thanksgiving there’s a segment titled “delicious homemade recipes.” So aren’t all recipes basically homemade? They started out in someone’s kitchen and then perhaps migrated to a local restaurant and then on to some big company like Nabisco. Ever heard of “Famous Amos” cookies?
Just recently I invented a great new hors d’oeuvre quite by accident. You take a Pringle potato chip and put pimento cheese in the concave part. If you put in on the convex part it will fall in your lap. On top of the pimento cheese you put some sweet hamburger relish. It’s a combination of sweet, salty and cheesy.
A lot of great inventions have come about this way – purely by accident. Take Viagra for instance. They were trying for a heart medicine, and someone in the test trial yelled out, “Hey! Would you looky here!”
Most of these emails I classify as entertainment. And they give me something to write about, which I guess makes them quasi-functional. For those still struggling with my column on “epiphany,” quasi means “partly” or “resembling.” It’s like a quasi-congressman, which basically means, “I’m not a real statesman, but I play one on TV.”
One thing I do love about Internet and emails is how fast one can get reaction to something said or done.
Call it mass communications, social networking or gossiping at the speed of light, the Internet is really a marvelous concept. Just beware though and don’t take any wooden nickels – unless of course they are made of mahogany, and they may actually be more valuable than the real thing.
Walden is editor/publisher of the Moultrie Observer and can be reached at email@example.com.