You may recall that two weeks ago I wrote an opinion piece announcing that we indeed had a new President Elect. Well hold on folks, things aren’t as solid as I thought they were.
My inside guy at the National Enquirer said the Electoral College will not be picking Mothman as the President Elect of the United States. It has something to do with a lack of evidence that Mothman truly exists.
Then he said that, after all the recounts and legal challenges, the states are certifying the results showing Biden would get 306 Electoral votes and Trump 232, if the Electoral College goes with the will of the American people.
There is more than sufficient evidence that Mothman is real. There are books, they made a movie, and the town of Point Pleasant West Virginia celebrates Mothman every year with a festival on the third weekend of September.
My friend said they’ve tried to fight the matter in court, but the judges are demanding to see hard proof, REAL EVIDENCE that Mothman is real. Otherwise the claims are “baseless and without merit” according to the courts.
The judges want to see Mothman with their own eyes and want to see his birth certificate to prove he is a US citizen, after current President Trump, who still refuses to concede, especially to a cryptid, claimed Mothman was an illegal alien.
This is ridiculous!
Millions of people say he is real; therefore, he must exist. We are being ripped off!
Our system is broken. I know he is real; you know he is real; we all know Mothman is real. Just because we can’t prove he is real doesn’t mean we should lose our voice after picking him as our next President.
I asked my friend if we could hire a better lawyer. One that we, the low to middle class people of the US, could afford since we are not wealthy or the top one percent.
Maybe we could afford a once respected lawyer who used to take down mobsters in New York but has since fallen on hard times. A man who was the strength of the community during the terror attacks on Sept. 11, but now uses shoe polish as hair dye and was caught in an awkward position in a Borat movie. I think we might be able to scrape enough funds together and pay, this most desperate in need of a better job attorney, to fight this all the way to the Supreme Court, if needed.
My friend said we can hire as many lawyers as needed, at our own tax-payers expense too!
In fact, he recommended we hire several lawyers since we may have to prove that Mothman’s cabinet picks of Bigfoot, Marvin the Martian, Roadrunner, and the Tasmanian Devil are real as well.
President Trump remains quiet on the issue of Mothman. However, he knows Mothman is real. In 2019 he retweeted a tweet by Senator Joe Manchin, West Virginia, who was wishing Mason County residents a Happy 2019 Mothman Festival. Manchin was posed in front of the 12-foot statue (Um, most statues are made to honor real people) of Mothman located in Point Pleasant. In his retweet President Trump said, “I stand with Joe.”
Proof positive that Trump knows Mothman is real, which is why he is bringing up the birther issue.
As a proud born in the USA voting American citizen, I will make it my mission to prove Mothman is real, a US citizen and the true new President of the United States. However, this mission will require funding so that I can search for him across this vast nation. According to an NPR report (as in National Public Radio, so it must be valid and more proof he is real) Mothman was spotted at least 70 times in Chicago just as recently as 2017. He has also been spotted in Kentucky and along the Appalachian Mountain Region. That’s a lot of ground to cover before the Electoral College makes a big mistake on Dec. 14.
I’m going to need to rent one of those fancy RVs. I’ll need it so I can pack my electronic equipment, trail cameras, thermal imaging devices and my dogs as we blaze a trail on a valiant search for truth and Democracy – In Search of Mothman!
I’ll post all my updates and journal notes online for the sake of transparency. The American people will be a part of this historic process.
I promise this will be a much better reality show than anything currently on CNN, FOX, OAN and Newsmax. And unlike the Geraldo Rivera, Al Capone vault fiasco, I know I’ll find Mothman for sure.
If you want to make a donation send me an email. You may even get a Mothman for President T-shirt!
Patty Leon, Senior Editor