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Silent fears facing deployment
Military spouse
Joselynn McKenna
Joselynn McKenna
Editor’s note: The wife of a soldier, Joselynn McKenna has agreed to attempt restarting the Courier’s military spouse column. Let us know how you think she does: editor@coastalcourier.com.

About a month ago, my husband came home during his lunch break and casually handed me a form. “Fill this out,” he said. “I have to take it back with me.”
I glanced over the sheet, anticipating the usual name and last four digits, but was surprised to see questions about funeral arrangements and who I’d like to tell me the bad news. Talk about a reality check.
As Army spouses, we try our best to ignore the fears in the back of our minds. We think important pre-deployment talk is what days the bills are due and how much extra grocery money we’ll have, but stay silent about what we care about most — our soldiers.
Before the fear becomes too much to bear, deal with it. Grab another Army spouse and admit that you’re afraid. You’ll soon find out you’re not the only one. When listening to other spouse’s stories, remember that no two soldiers are alike. Just because your friend’s spouse came back with an explosive temper doesn’t mean yours will, too.
Don’t forget that help is available. The Army may not get everything right, but they do provide resources to help you through the tough times, such as counseling and Family Readiness Groups. Whether this is your first deployment or your eighth, never be too proud to ask for help.
Finally, decide beforehand to support your soldier through the hard times. You want to go into this strong so you can come out of it even stronger.

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